When it came to starting a family there was one thing the Husband and I absolutely agreed on and that was we didn’t want a Christmas baby. That would just be rubbish. Turns out our sperm and eggs didn’t give two hoots about that and the Child arrived exactly a week before Christmas. To be honest we thought it was going to be closer. I remember, when I was told if things didn’t get a move on I would be induced on Christmas Eve afternoon, lamenting to my husband how no one would come to the Child’s 18th birthday if it was that close to Christmas. He quite rightly told me to pull myself together.
Anyway, since we did have a Christmas baby I’m determined that her birthday is distinctive from Christmas. In fact, mention of the C-word is banned on her birthday. Baby Jesus gets his day and so does the Child or, as was the case this year, a whole weekend. So here it is, the Child’s non-Christmas Christmas birthday in ten steps. Not going to lie, it involved a lot of cake.
Pre-birthday family party, complete with the Husband’s panic over not having enough food resulting in emergency quiche and Pringles purchasing. We still disagree over whether they were needed or not.
Pre-birthday birthday cake. This one was made by my sister-in-law, adorned with Frozen’s Elsa and resulted in me quietly losing my shit at the Child asking if she could eat the cake every 5 seconds (read – speaking to her through gritted teeth because there were other people present).
Face cakes. The wonderful people at Caketoppers sent me some personalised mini-cupcakes to review which we did with gusto. Caketoppers specialise in cakes, cupcakes and edible cake toppers available for delivery across the UK. The cakes came really neatly packaged, tasted delicious and, despite my reservation about any cake being mini, was the perfect little treat size for kids and adults.
You can choose any photo/image for the top (no, not that one you filthy so-and-so) to personalise it. The photo look really nice although it was a little weird eating a cake with a photo of the Child on but it didn’t seem to bother her. In a real mind-fuck, I’d chosen a picture of the Child eating a cake so now I have a photo of the Child eating a cake with a photo on of her eating a cake. Next year I’ll put that photo on a cake and continue every year until we all disappear in a vortex of self-cake eating cakes.
Panto trip (oh no we didn’t). We’d decided this year not to do a big kids party but take the Child to the Panto instead. I wasn’t really interested in watching some reality TV ‘star’ prance around in tights (now if it had been Mr Bloom in tights…) so we plumped for the Everyman and Playhouse’s non-traditional Rock ‘n’ Roll version of Beauty and the Beast. I wasn’t quite sure how the Child would react but she loved it, especially the farting and bottom jokes and didn’t make a peep for two hours.
Birthday morning spent clarifying to Child that Father Christmas did not bring her birthday presents – I did and I want the credit unlike at Christmas.
And the winner of the Child’s most favourite presents are Nana and Poppa who got her roller skates and an Anna doll. Although to be fair I picked the Anna doll so why the hell I got one that sang I have no idea.
And the winner of self-proclaimed Mum of the Year is me for beautifully crafting a birthday card and sending it in to CBeebies 6 weeks early. I even got complimented on the ‘sweet message’ I wrote because I was totally nailing parenting that day.
Actual-birthday birthday cake. So the real plan was to take a caterpillar cake into nursery but the Child spotted it so we had to have it or face her significant wrath. Luckily we like cake.
We couldn’t let the Child’s birthday pass without having a few of her friends round to play so we had a little post-birthday party. It also gave me an opportunity to make a birthday cake. The Child is pretty obsessed with Go Jetters but my cake-making skills don’t quite stretch to anything more than round or square so when Caketoppers also offered to send me a topper I jumped at the chance.
I have to admit I found it difficult to get the topper off the backing sheet but that was more due to my impatience/ inability to read instructions properly than the topper itself. Aside from that though, I was really impressed by how vibrant the topper was and it tasted good too. It also helped elevate my slightly wonky creation to ‘proper’ birthday cake and is much easier (and cheaper) than getting a whole cake made.
No birthday post would be complete without a bit of vom-inducing sap so bear with me. Usually my bedtime technique favours the old hug-and-roll style of ditching the child in her bed and hoping for the best until morning. But this weekend, when the Child asked for a bedtime cuddle I couldn’t resist squeezing myself into her teeny tiny bed, curling myself around her and telling her about the first night we spent together 3 years ago, alone in a hospital room doing exactly the same.
Happy Birthday my gorgeous girl.
I received 12 mini-cupcakes and a cake topper free-of-charge in return for this review but all opinion and words expressed are my own (especially the rude ones and that one about sperm).